Toka Te Manawa
- 1. Te kaha kino
- 2. Kaore koe i te koa kei roto koe i te hononga
- 3. Kaore koe e whirinaki ki to hoa
- 4. Kaore koe e pai ki te whakawhiti korero
- 5. Kaore koe e hono ki tetahi atu
- 6. Kaore koe e maia
Ko te nuinga o taatau ka whakaae ko te whakauru ki nga hononga hauora ko te mea nui katoa o te koiora kua tutuki. Ko te noho whanaungatanga tetahi o nga mea e tika ana hei oranga me te noho pai.
Ma te whanaungatanga e whakakoi i o taatau koiora me te taapiri atu ki o taatau harikoa ki te ora, engari e mohio ana tatou katoa kaore he hononga tino pai. Ahakoa e ahei ana te tangata ki te korero ki etahi atu i runga i te pai me te whakarei ake, heoi, kaore tenei i te waa katoa.
I etahi wa, ka tukuna e taatau te hunga he kia uru mai ki to taatau koiora. Ko ta maatau hononga ki a ratau kaore i te pai, kaore i te hauora, kaore i te maarama, me te nuinga, kaore i te hua- e mohiotia ana he hononga kino.
Ko enei hononga kino ka raru pea ka raruraru te tapu o to hinengaro, wairua, kare me to tinana.
Na, he aha te mea ka kino te whanaungatanga?
Hei tautuhi mena kei te piri koe ki tetahi tangata kino, anei etahi tohu mo te whanaungatanga kino. Mena ka taea e koe te hono atu ki tetahi o enei ahuatanga o te whanaungatanga kino, me tirotiro ano e koe to hononga.
1. Te kaha kino
I a koe e uru atu ana ki te hononga kino, he pukuriri koe, he riri, he pukuriri i te taha o to hoa i te nuinga o te waa. He maha pea nga take.
Heoi, ko tenei momo hononga kino ka tipu te kaha o te kaha ki to tinana ka piki ranei ki te wehe me te awangawanga tetahi ki tetahi.
Ko te noho kino i roto i te marenatanga, te kino ranei i roto i nga whanaungatanga tata ka heke koe i etahi atu waahanga o to koiora.
Ko te kaha kino i roto i te whanaungatanga ka raru to hinengaro, a-tinana, a-matauranga, a-wairua, a-whatumanawa hoki. Ka akiakihia maatau ki te whakatutuki i tenei pouri kaore ko to whanaungatanga hei whakaora mai i tera momo ahotea.
2. Kaore koe i te koa kei roto koe i te hononga
Ko tetahi tohu nui o te whanaungatanga kino ko te kore koe e koa ki te uru atu ano ki roto. E mohio ana tatou katoa kaore e taea te noho humarie i nga wa katoa o to whanaungatanga, engari i te katoa, ko te noho tahi me to hoa me whakarahi ake to koa
Me mohio koe ki to hoa tautoko, whai ngakau, koa, me te ahei ki te mahi i nga mea katoa e hiahia ana koe.
Ka kore koe e koa ki te taha o to hoa, he tohu whakatupato tera kei roto koe i te hononga kino.
3. Kaore koe e whirinaki ki to hoa
Mena kaore koe e whirinaki ki to hoa, he tohu maamaa mo te tuakore i roto i te whanaungatanga. Kei roto koe i te whanaungatanga kino ka tiimata ana koe ki te ruarua i nga kupu me nga mahi a to hoa.
Mena he maha nga korero a to hoa taapiri, kua whakarereke ranei i te pono i te kore ratau e pai ki te huarahi o te korerorero, he tohu tera kei te piri koe ki tetahi hoa kaore i te pono.
Ka hurihia e to hoa te koha mo a raatau mahi ki tetahi atu, ki taua ahuatanga ranei, ka whakaatu koe kei roto koe i te hononga kino me tetahi tangata kaore e pai ki te whai i a raatau mahi.
4. Kaore koe e pai ki te whakawhiti korero
Rite tonu ki te korerorero te koiora o te whanaungatanga hauora me te pai, ko te kore o taua mea ka arahi te hononga kia kino, kia hauora, kia paitini. Mena kaore e pai ake te whakawhitiwhiti korero, ka mutu pea te hononga.
Kaore koe e korero ki a koe ano he kanohi ki te kanohi, ahakoa he tata tetahi ki tetahi. He pai ake ki a koe te whakamahi i nga tohu me nga tuhinga kaore i te korero korero.
Kaore he korero whaihua, ka whakamahi noa koe i nga kupu iti rawa hei herenga. Ko enei ko nga ahuatanga kino o te hononga.
Mena kaore e taea e koe te korero whaihua i roto i te whanaungatanga, he tohu kei te kino koe i te hoa ranei.
Ka puta ake tetahi mea i te ao, ahakoa he whakatutukitanga, he kaupapa, he kaupapa ranei, kaore ko to hoa te tangata tuatahi ka tohaina e koe- ma tenei e tohu nga raru whakawhiti korero ka hua ake ai te hononga kino.
5. Kaore koe e hono ki tetahi atu
Ka kore koe e rata ki te taha o to hoa, he tohu kei roto koe i te whanaungatanga hauora, paitini ranei.
Ka kite ana koe mo etahi wa roa kei te noho tahi korua i te taha tinana engari kaore i te noho tahi i runga i te kare a roto kare-a-roto, he tohu maamaa mo te whanaungatanga kino me te koretake.
Ka taea e koe te noho ki roto i te ruuma kotahi, engari ko tetahi o koe kei te panui i runga i te pona, i te waea ranei. Kaore koe e hono atu ki tetahi atu ahakoa kei te moe tonu koe i runga i to moenga kotahi.
Ano hoki, kaore koe e aro ki tenei ahuatanga, a kaore tetahi o koutou e ngana ki te whakarereke. Koinei nga ahuatanga whanaungatanga kino e kitea ana.
6. Kaore koe e maia
Ka tiimata ana koe ki te noho humarie i roto i te whanaungatanga, kaore koe e mohio ki to tuunga i roto i te whanaungatanga, ka tohu pea kei roto koe i te hononga kino.
Akene ka whakaaro koe kaore koe e mohio ki to tuunga, ki to hononga ranei. Kaore pea koe e awangawanga, kaore e tau, kaore ranei e manukanuka ki te huarahi kei te ahu te hononga.
Ka tiimata ana to whakaaro ki tetahi hononga, korero ki to hoa, ka paatai kei hea te hononga i waenganui o korua.
Mena kaore e taea e raatau te whakautu ki a koe, he korero kei te pehea e kite ai korua i te heke mai, engari kaore pea te mutunga o te hononga. Ka taea e koe te hoki mai ki tenei korerorero i etahi wa i muri i to ratau tawhiti ki te whakaaro.
Koinei etahi o nga ahuatanga whanaungatanga kino kino. Mena ka kite koe i etahi o enei e roa ana mo to wa roa i roto i to hononga, me matua arotahi atu koe ki to hononga me to tirohanga ki te huarahi.
Ano hoki, ki te whakaaro koe ehara i te kino to whanaungatanga i tena wa, engari kua pakaru noa iho mo nga take kore, tirohia te riipene ataata e whai ake nei.
Akene ka ngaro pea koe i etahi take nui. I te tuatahi, arotahi ki te kaha ki te whakaora i to hononga me te whakahoki ano i to marena.
Engari, ki te kore e kitea e koe te ara ki taua ahuatanga, ki te kaha ranei koe ki te whakahaere i a koe katoa, ka taea e koe te rapu awhina mai i o hoa piri, o to whanau ranei e whakapono ana koe.
Ko te rapu awhina ngaio mai i tetahi kaitohutohu, i tetahi kaiwhakawhana raihana ranei ka awhina i a koe ki te tarai i to ahuatanga ka whakatau tika.